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Back in October the lovely team over at Satisfyer sent me a couple of products to try in exchange for fair and honest reviews. It’s been a very long time since those initial conversations and delivery, when testing began. In between recovering from a small procedure and blasted covid, I am so glad of my testing notes. It’s time to look back on those notes and see how I was experimenting with the Wand-Er Woman by Satisfyer. As luck would have it, this ties in quite nicely with the new meme: Five Things.
1- Oh My God! What’s in here?
The toys arrived so quickly I had no idea what was in the package on my doorstep. Picking up the parcel I was taken aback by the weight. Which says something about the plain packaging that was used too. I always exercise caution when the postman delivers, but on this occasion my children were at school and I ripped open the plastic wrapping. Inside were two toys by Satisfyer. The Wand-er Woman came out first, and the other will require a little patience on your side.
Putting the other toy to one side I lifted the larger, and significantly heavier box out of the packaging. I have said it before and I’ll say it again- I love the effort that goes in to Satisfyer’s packaging. The colour schemes and artwork really do it for me. After taking a close up look at the toy inside it’s window, I ripped the sealing strip from the cardboard and was able to reach my new treasure. Lifting the weighty toy from its home I discovered that, though it felt heavy in the box the way this was distributed was actually very clever. Holding it near the base my hand soon tired, but the closer I got to the centre the easier it was to maintain grip for a longer time.
For comparisons sake, it weighed in at 647g. 90g heavier than the Hitachi corded version. I was surprised to discover it is only 7g weightier than my Doxy- plug and all!
2- Out of the box Wand-er Woman experiments begin.
Once I had this new piece of equipment in my hands I was really quite taken with the feel of it. It’s no secret that the Satisfyer silicon is just right for my pleasure. Very smooth and easy to make slick, but also it has a slight drag which creates tension in my flesh. Satisfyer’s Wand-er Woman was no different in this respect. Plus it is a work of art, the smooth shape only slightly interrupted by the power buttons, and the magnetic charging point that I now associate with Satisfyer.
It wasn’t long before the light was blinking away and so I took the opportunity to sit with a cup of tea, read the instructions. And with the battery full to the brim after those first five hours, I knew that I’d have about seventy minutes of playtime ahead of me.
To power on the wand you press the wavey line for three seconds. To turn it off you just repeat this action, press and hold until the wand stops vibrating. You can go up and down through the five levels of intensity by using the plus and minus ends of the pink button. And pressing the wavey button (being careful not to hold it down too long) you can scroll through the ten patterns until you find the one that works for you. Each of these buttons is slightly raised making it readable with my finger/thumb tip..
Unlike other large wands this one is incredibly quiet. There is no loud rumbling vibrations to rip through the house. This means I’ve been able to enjoy it in relative peace and quiet while my children are in bed, safe in the knowledge I won’t disturb them. (With the wand noise, anyway.) In the absence of the noise that I usually experience, I did notice something else. A slight whining noise in the background. To my ears it isn’t intrusive, but it was noticeable and so it’s only right that I mention it.
3- Getting intimate with Wand-er Woman.
How would I use those seventy minutes though? Initially I worked my way through the intensity levels and the patterns manually. Naturally, because I’m greedy for sensations, I explored my more sensitive areas with the large head as I did this. The vibrations weren’t jarring or thuddy. They weren’t buzzy either. Throughout my explorations I was impressed with the way they just kind of melted through me. Building pleasure and sensation, not intense, but not frustrating either. The oral sex of the wand world seems to be the image that comes to my mind, via my apex.
In order for me to reach climax I want deeper vibrations, so I can’t share my fireworks with you. Don’t worry though, in the interest of science I took this pleasure baton on tour. I’m pleased to inform you that I have a friend who usually struggles with the intensity of larger wands. Her clitoris also rejects the smaller, buzzier wands. The Wand-er Woman tipped her over the edge of pleasure in a way she’d not experienced before. Success? I would say so!
Because of the delicious way the power seeped through my flesh I’d been keen to test the vibrations out as a body massager. When Covid hit me hard I was granted just the opportunity to try it out in exactly this way. With tired, aching muscles I was in need of a thorough going over. Isolation meant I had but one sensible option. To put my latest sex toy to good use. The way the body is angled meant I could prop it carefully under my shoulder blades and poke the more angled base into a cushion. Without the wire it stayed in position.
4- Experimenting with cleaning the Wand-er Woman.
The beauty of many Satisfyer toys is that they are fully waterproof. I’ve already mentioned that they are made of body safe silicon. So you have plenty of options when it comes to cleaning. You can boil it, wash it with a soft cloth, use toy cleaner. There is a soft lip between the head and the body, and you can clean under the egdes. (More on this feature later though.) As ever, I’ve popped it through a dishwasher so you don’t have to risk getting it wrong. It still works! (I’m sure this isn’t an officially recommended cleaning technique. It would also, likely, negate the fifteen year warranty. However, I had no problem on my single cycle.)
Satisfyer always impress me with the length of time the battery holds charge. The seventy minutes is conservative, and between plays it doesn’t diminish power. Unlike other rechargeable toys I can put them aside for extended periods and come back the same amount of life as when I popped it away. So I can charge before filing, then pick up where I left off a number of weeks (or in the case of my Master months) later! Which is exactly what has happened this week.
5- A surprise ending to my investigation.
I’ve been working through my notes and fact-checking myself over the last week or so. Upon picking up the dormant wand I discovered something I’d not really noticed before. The head was covered in a silicon hat, not just a lip for to make cleaning awkward. This isn’t something I’d read about on the Satisfyer website, nor is it something I’d read elsewhere. But sure enough, that little silicon cap came off. A fantastic option for easier cleaning, I thought. But as I twirled the head around my pointer finger I looked at the body of the toy which I’d not seen before. It wouldn’t feel any different would it? Curiosity crept through me. I decided my experiments weren’t done yet, and picked up Satisfyer’s Wand-er Woman. Just in case.
Initially I pressed it against my thigh. I may have some light marks and the sensation was very enjoyable. Working up, closer to my most intimate creases. Taunting myself I edged closer. When I reached my labia the smaller head nudged between them. Without its little cap on the head wasn’t just smaller, it was also firmer. As a result the vibrations no longer gently melted into my flesh. Oh no, now they fired into me. Leaving me breathless, needy, wanting. And yes… orgasmic
Final thoughts on my explorations and the Wand-er Woman.
I am always on the lookout for a replacement wand, my favourite has had quite a life and won’t last forever. Satisfyer’s offering of the Wand-er Woman was well worth taking a closer look at. And what if I’d not discovered the outer head could be removed? I would likely have passed her along to my friend who had such great success with it. But now I will continue testing, make sure it wasn’t just a fluke.
It is a good all rounder, and has definitely taken top spot for body massage. The warm, gentle vibration is perfect for easing aching muscles. More-so, perhaps, than it’s mains powered counterparts. And the price tag is a draw too. Currently available through the Satisfyer site the Wand-er Woman is priced at £53.95.
From the story of how the barefoot sub became the woman she is today, to toy reviews, with a hefty dose of contemplation, a sprinkling of erotica and a LOT of nudity in between, you can be sure to find something to tickle your fancy at A Leap Of Faith.