Super Powerful Wand On A Budget!

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I often find myself wondering how many more orgasms my favourite wand will be able to drag from my body. The Doxy is now six years old and has had a hard life, definitely providing value for money in the climax stakes. But sometimes the motors start chugging, and the otherwise smooth vibrations take on a pattern. At these times I wonder about its replacement. Is there a super wand that can match up to powerful old faithful? In these uncertain times, can I find one that matches my budget? With the cost-of-living spiralling, I would also prefer not to spend over £100 on a replacement if I don’t need to, unless I need to. And I’m sure I’m not the only one feeling the pinch.

The hunt for a new favourite wand is on.

Enter Funzze, a budget sex toy brand who stock bright, colourful and fun pleasure products. You can check them out here.

I introduced Funzze to the site last month with a review of the Honey ducky 2, but the explorations didn’t stop there. I was invited to choose two products for review, and with the thought of my ailing Doxy in mind I chose the biggest wand I could find. Have a look at the Super Powerful Massager for yourself before we get started.

Funzze have very discrete packaging, using unmarked, folded cardboard boxes.

Personally, I appreciate the lack of plastic and glue from an environmental perspective, but also understand this helps keep the cost down. Inside the box was an instruction manual, charging cable and a long pink bag- big enough to store the wand.

The body is made from ABS plastic, and the charging port is in the base of the handle, and there are three buttons in the middle. The flexible neck at the top of the toy provides a strong mount for the massagers head. I just needed to charge it up and away I could go. (A two to three hour charge will give a full battery and up to two hours of playtime, depending on intensity of vibrations.)

On the subject of vibrations what does the Funzze Super Powerful Massager offer?

It has twenty vibration modes and eight intensities. These are controlled by the three buttons on the silicone section of the main body. The one with the power symbol turns it on and off. The zig zag button cycles through the patterns and the lines takes you through the intensities. With both of the cycling buttons the changes go from end to end, rather than round in a cycle. Bottom to top, then back to the bottom again. This is frustrating for someone like me who is well known for losing count.

For example, there are twenty patterns. I want number three but pass straight by because my needy clit is shouting “HURRY UP, GET ME OFF, NOWWWWWW!!”. Now I have to go all the way up to twenty before dropping back down to two. Thirty-six steps to get through, I think, and if I lose count then I miss it. The same happens with the intensity level, which may have had me swearing at myself. (Not in the throes of orgasm way.)

However, the buttons work independently of each other.

When you power up the wand it starts with straight vibrations. Here you can just scroll through the eight intensities, as described above. But… at the same time as increasing and decreasing the speed of vibration you can also go through the patterns. In spite of my misgivings on the pattern/intensity selection I must say it’s a nice twist to be able to change the intensity of the patterns. For me, a deep, rumbling pulse pattern is much more effective than a gentle and frustrating pulse pattern.

And if it all gets a bit confusing? One quick press of the power button and everything stops. Then press it again and the power starts on steady, high-intensity vibrations.

As an aside, the ability to turn it off or on with just a quick press may cause problems if you take this away with you. There is no travel lock so it’s possible that this wand would go off in the bag if charged.

But what about the vibrations. How do they feel?

The name “super powerful massager” suggests that this wand provides deep, penetrating vibrations, and it really does deliver on that front. While they are certainly not jarring, these vibrations aren’t necessarily as smooth as toys that sit further up the cost spectrum, but that’s no bad thing. Sometimes, during periods of extreme use, those smooth yet deep vibrations can lead to (what I describe as) clit blindness. Where the clit is over stimulated and goes to sleep for a few days. (Does anyone else get this? Surely it can’t just be me.)

During a busy week of edging recently I experienced this same problem with the Doxy. Switching out my old favourite for the spritely and sleek super powerful massager I applied a little more of my current favourite water-based lube. My body responded in the way I’d been hoping, woke up and drew me along to the crest of an unmet orgasm.

This was its first outing, and I was excited to try it when I wasn’t on an orgasm ban.

The following week, as I binged on climax after climax, I took the wand from the pink bag it came with and pressed to my apex. It wasted no time in pulling me over the edge of orgasm- my first with this wand- and kept me there as a second and third rolled out of me. Still not done I paired it up with the Romp Hype. With both my G-spot and clitoris sparkling with pleasure the next climax was explosive and left me in a puddle of my own delights.

Cleaning up after play time is over.

On the subject of overflowing with pleasure, perhaps it’s important to say that the wand has a waterproof rating of IPX6, so it’s ok for gushing over, but not for taking in the bath or shower. Washing the head with anti-bac soap and drying with a soft cloth before storing in its bag is all you need to do.

Sizing up the super powerful massager.

Weighing in at just 327g it is almost 200g lighter than the wand I use so often. With a lightweight, moulded plastic body, this massager doesn’t feel like a top end toy. At least not when it’s been held in my hand. But being light weight means that it doesn’t tire my wrist so easily on a long play session, I can only imagine that a person with mobility issues may benefit from this hugely. The body is as long as my forearm, and the head is large enough that I can cup it in my hand, but not hide it in my palm.

Final thoughts on the Super Powerful Massager.

I was pleasantly surprised by the sensations offered up by this wand, and the powerful massaging head. I was impressed with the strength of vibrations, given how the body feels light and fragile. But ABS plastic has a lot to answer for, and the silicone head, flexible neck and strong vibrations mean the toy doesn’t feel as budget as the price tag suggests.

Savings have clearly been made with the packaging which is very basic in its design. The wand arrived in perfect condition so there are no complaints from me. Personally, I rather like simple packaging. It makes recycling it so much less obvious. (Ricos moulded packaging was somewhat harder to pass off as standard household waste!)

For me, I’d prefer to be able to scroll through in a full circle, if I can’t have separate up and down buttons. And it would be great to have a travel lock for the power button. I do appreciate that this is all extra hardware and programming which would increase the cost. But these are minor niggles in a sex toy that surprised me by living up to its name. The Super Powerful Massager does exactly what you would hope. Delivers deep and penetrating vibrations to the clitoris and labia. (And anywhere else you would benefit from a good massage.)

It will be interesting to see how this wand stands the test of time and hard work, but I know I’m looking forward to putting in the research hours. So far though, this wand has earnt a place in my bedside drawer. The space reserved for regularly used toys.

Are you curious about the Super Powerful Massager, and if it has a place in your toybag? Costing just $29.99 you can find it on Funzze, along with many other fun adult toys.