Good Sex And Smiles: My True Way?

“You can always tell a woman who hasn’t had good sex in a while.
Her face contorts in a way her body has been missing.“

The words shared above are this weeks prompt for No True Way. I can’t speak for every woman, but the header image shows what happens to this woman’s face when she’s had good sex. The big, relaxed smile on my face in the early hours after giving myself some extra fine loving. But then, I tend to have a big relaxed smile on my face for much of the time, regardless of how recently I’ve indulged in pleasures of the flesh.

More important than my face is the question: “What is good sex?”

When I read the quote I was immediately taken to my fabswingers account, where it’s often assumed that, just because I’m not looking for guys I must need a good fucking to remind myself what I’m missing. (Nice, huh? If only they knew!) My furrowed brow matching the statement that formed: “I bet this is written by one of those men.” You know the kind that thinks they just need to poke a woman to satisfy her aching flesh. But for me good sex is so much more than PIV.

Don’t get me wrong. Penis In Vagina sex can be glorious, in fact any kind of sex with a penis can be. But so can sex with vulvas. And mouths, hands and toys. It can include multiple lovers or be intimate solo sex. There is no one size fits all. Certainly not for me. In fact I’m sure even good sex would soon become mediocre without variety. (I love Steak but I’d soon get bored if this was my only dinner option.)

Is my sex life tailored to fit me? You bet!

Meticulously managed by the marvellous man who knows me so well. Not only does he treat me to exceptional experiences when we’re together. He gives me the space I need to create mind blowing scenes when he’s physically absent.

When he is here my body is in his hands, literally.

He knows what I enjoy, what I’d like to try and what is off limits. He also knows what he likes, and combines our two sets of preferences to create scenes that leave me glassy eyed and dumb struck for hours after. Giddy from my marks, yes. But also from the deep connection that forms the basis of our dynamic.

But he manages my sexual satisfaction at all times, even from across the globe.

He has made it clear that, when tasked to enjoy myself with others, I shouldn’t settle for less than top quality. Great sex with delicious people who tick my boxes. His task will usually be a detail-light set of instructions. “Stretch yourself” or “receive orgasms”, coupled with “try to please me, but most importantly please yourself”. This requires finding the right people. Lovers who are as enthusiastic as I am to ensure that we have an amazing time, but who also respect me and my relationship. And who I can communicate with efficiently. Obviously, my task is about my own satisfaction as well as entertaining Sir. Don’t for a moment think my friends needs get neglected. If they’re not having an outstanding time then I wouldn’t be having the good sex I’ve been instructed with having.

There are times when he takes control of my ability to pleasure myself.

This happens less often now, thanks to the fantastic array of products I’ve been testing, but no matter. My orgasms are still his. And with that I assume the responsibility of making them fit my mood. Mindfully practising good solo sex has been a revelation. Even those “I’m so grumpy I need to orgasm- quickly!” playtimes are focussed on making it right. And those tempestuous moods… They’re caused by external stressors, not internal, unmet desires.

Where was I going with this post…?

Ah yes, the statement at the top and my post-coital face.

So, I’m often smiling, usually wearing a relaxed grin. And whenever I have sex I know that it will be good- by my measures. But while strumming my worries away solo is a wonderful way to rest my demons, and I enjoy time with sir as well as others, I’m not constantly in a state of sex-induced bliss. Sometimes life is busy and I’ll go weeks without touching myself, months without mutual partnered satisfaction. My face doesn’t contort with frustration as the days pass. So I can only summarise that it’s not the good sex that causes the smile but the sunny disposition that lies inside.

Before I go it’s September Song Project and today I want to talk about sex!

So, let me ask… What makes sex good for you? And how does it affect your face after?