What do fantasy, needs and a Hot Octopuss all have in common? Join me for this weeks TMI Tuesday and find out!
1. Does your sex life need some fantasy? What kind of fantasy?
I think my sex life is well served with fantasy. As a single mum in a long distance D/s relationship, with restrictions within my dynamic and covid risk, I would say the vast majority of my sex life is heavily based in fantasy. I’m not sure there are enough words in my fingers to tell you the sort of fantasy, but the one that haunts me at the moment includes Sir, zoom and toys designed for shared sensations between long distance couples.
2. What is eroticism for you?
For me erotcism is the subtle temptation of sexual desires. This is something I aspire to, though currently lack. As I’m subtle as a breezeblock when it comes to expressing myself. This is great when it comes to being open and honest within relationships, but seduction has paid the price of my direct style of communication!
3. You are invited to a kink party, will you go?
If it is safe and I’m child-free then yes, I imagine so. As a big believer in meeting new people and trying new things then I try to attend as much as I can. Never with expectation of play, but always I check for volumes of tea available. If nothing else, it’s just lovely to sit in a corner and watch scenes unfold around the play spaces.
4. Your lover has tied your naked body down. What do you want to happen next?
a. You get tickled mercilessly
b. You are covered in whip cream and people lick the cream entirely from your naked body
c. Bind, blind, and tease your erogenous zones with an ice cube, feather, candle wax, tongue, etc.
d. A sex toy is used to penetrate you to orgasm.
With this scenario my mind automatically goes to Sir and if he has me tied down I would take whichever of the options please him. Though I’m not ticklish and not a fan of playing with food. With him I’d probably choose impact play and forced orgasms. But those aren’t on the list!
5. In your sex life, do you go along with whatever your partner wants and needs or when necessary do you handle things to make sure you have thrilling sex?
My sex life is at the whim of Sir.
This may seem strange as we are long distance but it works for us. I don’t have permission to ask for meets with others currently, so I have to wait to be tasked with that. However, he’s generous with his submissive and likes to see me fulfilled so, other commitments permitting, I do get these requests.
The nature of these varies depending on what he is hoping to achieve through the tasks. Sometimes it is to practise a skill, other times to gain confidence in myself and then there are the times he wants me to go and create a fantasy of my own. Then I have full creative control, so long as I am safe! I love to surprise him with these tasks, often surprising myself in the process. His pleasure comes from watching me grow, so I guess you could say that I am deferring to his wants and needs here, as well as my own.
But what about when we are together.
I will always defer to his desires in our scene time. However, I know that his wants and needs are not just about him. And it is just as important for me to enjoy the play in my own right as it is for me to enjoy pleasing him. Our most recent time together shows exactly this. Some time ago we had a less than ideal scene. It didn’t go as he had hoped, and he has wanted to put it right ever since. Last year he asked me to write a fantasy around that scenario. He wanted to know what I would find exciting and arousing. When we were joined by a lady friend of mine a few weeks ago he was able to take that fantasy and make it his own.
And boy! Did we have an amazing time. (I can’t speak for anyone else actually, I had a great time. And Sir was pleased with that outcome.) So, while I was immersed in the scene that he was in complete control of, he was able to create something he knew would work for me. Both putting the other persons wants and needs at the forefront.
Bonus: When is the last time you purchased a sex toy? What did you buy? Was it purchased online or at a store?
Oh my goodness, my latest purchase is a few weeks old. I chose the Hot Octopuss Kurve through their site. Initial testing has been positive, eyes have had to be forcibly uncrossed and rehydration has been made a priority. Enjoying my fantasies, satisfying my needs and making the most of delicious memories, all while absorbing the kurve into my very core!
Have you enjoyed Fantasy, Needs and a Hot Octopuss. What’s The Link? Perhaps you’ll enjoy this post: My First TMI Tuesday of 2021.
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