That Thang I do TMI Tuesday header

That Thang I Do! TMI Tuesday.

TMI Tuesday thang header image of two watercolour heads leaning back into each other.

Well, it seems to be Tuesday again, and the questions for this week have caught my eye. Plus, with a call to action like this “Hello again. Do your TMI Tuesday thang now.” how can I possibly refuse?

So, without further ado, it’s time to do that thang that I do (when the mood strikes me).

1. Compared to 5 years ago do you care more or less about what people think of you?

I don’t think it care any more or any less what other people think of me. I generally care less about what the inner critic says though. (Unless I’m experiencing drop, or so it seems.) Five years ago, I believed that no-one would think as badly of me as I did. But now, I don’t think badly of myself (usually), and I realised that other people’s opinions of me are none of my business. Same result, different route there.

2. What is the last self-help book, article or blog post you read? Did it help you?

I’m currently wading through a horrendous dose of sub drop. It’s been a while since I’ve had it quite so bad (or ever?), and it’s taken me by surprise. It shouldn’t have done, in all honesty we pushed hard stretched some boundaries last week. But some bad news in my vanilla life, plus a misunderstanding during the scene has given my head a whole bunch of stuff to chew on. I know it’s drop, I recognise it as such, this isn’t my normal state. But while I stood crying into my dinner prep I thought I’d have a look for a quick fix. (Ha, yeah, I know. I just have to ride the storm.) So, I picked up my phone. Googled it. And found this article:

Slutty Girl Problems: What Is Sub Drop?

In all honesty it didn’t tell me anything new. But it did reassure me that I’m doing all the right things (for me) and that this storm will pass but until then I just need to dance in the rain.

And, I hadn’t heard of this website before, so now I have somewhere else to distract myself if the post-scene blues get too much.

3. Tell us 3 people you must have in your life.

My two children, I value my child free time, but longer periods are exhausting. The third person… I love having Sir in my world, everything is exponentially better with him at the helm. However, as my world has grown, since getting rid of P, and I have an inner circle of people I love having in my world. However, I’m also happy in my own little world and so long as those I care about are healthy and safe then just knowing they’re somewhere out there is enough. We each have different paths to follow, don’t we.

4. Does tech interfere with your personal relationships? How so?

Sir and I are mostly long distance. This means that tech plays an integral part in our relationship, it’s how we do our thang. But as I sit here typing this my youngest is kicking the ball about in our lounge and I’m keeping half an eye on his developing skills. Sometimes that won’t be enough and then I’m torn between working and being an appreciative mum. On the flip side, my children are both of a generation that is immersed in tech. For example, their dad has ALL the consoles, computer, iPad, phones, fancy pants sky, TV and ALL the streaming services. On their weekends with him it’s not unheard of for them to stay inside the house for the whole 48 hours. Which means that I have to handle the tech hangover on the Sunday evening, Monday, Tuesday and occasionally Wednesday. It’s no mean feat, but it’s also nothing that football in the field (or living room), playing in the rivers and good, old-fashioned board games can’t sort out.

5. When you want your partner or friend’s undivided attention, how do you communicate that?

I tell them! (And expect the same in return. We’re none of us mind readers!) Generally, if I call it’s urgent and I need their undivided attention for a sob or a wail or some drama. (My friends and I aren’t altogether telephone call people.) Most people know that if I send them a message, I’m happy to wait and there’s no need for apology on a slow reply. If it’s urgent, I’ll pop URGENT in the start of the message. (This doesn’t happen very often at all!) With Sir I sign off in a different manner, but life is busy, and I won’t be making him feel bad for not being able to pick up his emails due to work commitments. It’s all about communication and working out what works in each relationship.

Bonus: What is your view of love?

I think love is a beautiful thing. For me it is a very freeing experience, since figuring out what love actually is from my perspective. That’s been a fairly recent revelation, only back in 2018 did all the pieces slot into place. I wrote about that in the post Fresh Air and Big Skies.

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If you don’t fancy doing that thang too, have a flick through my TMI Tuesday archives for more random selections of questions and answers.

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