Trust your landmark and run through the smoke.

Lady reclining over her sofa, touching her pussy while wearing a medal from her landmark moment

This week Food For Thought Friday has asked us to think about Landmark in our lifes.

What, if any, have been your particular landmarks, either in relation to your blog or your wider life?

Do you have any future goals/landmarks you want to achieve? What are they?

I have been very quiet this month for a number of reasons. The first was my study. With the end of my module came assignment pressure and extra work took over. Alongside this life has thrown me an unwanted curve ball; managing this has taken up a lot of energy but also marks a significant shift in my wellbeing. Previously an episode like this would have floored me, but this time I have held my own… battered but not beaten. This in itself is a landmark achievement for me.

But it is not the one that I want to talk about today!

As I have mentioned previously I like to run. It was the one thing I was allowed to do for me while I was married, and after a couple of years break and significant weight gain the return of Sir heralded my return to running in January last year. Since before I met him I had the goal of wanting to run a marathon, and when he departed again in the summer he left me the task of running a marathon by the end of February. Losing him again was painful, but I had a goal. He had set me a task because he believed I could do it, even though I didn’t quite have the belief in myself. All winter I trained, loving the longer distances, the freedom of the miles, the openness of the big sky over my head. I had the race date for the start of february, a gloriously hilly first marathon. Local enough that I knew the area and could practise parts of the route. My beloved Dartmoor. Races leading up to the big day went exactly as planned. The longest run felt amazing and I could have carried on all day. I was ready! Body, mind, and soul working together.

My landmark moment had arrived.

Or so I thought. The start  of February brought snow to Dartmoor, the race was postponed. I went out for a marathon distance run that day, and ended up with an injury, catching the train home from half way. I was left feeling like I had failed Sir in my task. I wouldn’t be able to achieve the marathon I had been tasked with, I wondered why I should even bother to find another marathon seeing as I had let him down. What was the point? I had this one-sided conversation with a friend, venting my frustrations at him in text form. And as I let all the pain and frustration out my memory was jarred to Sir’s response to a task the previous summer. A plan had fallen through and I had needed to scrabble around to fulfill the brief. After everything had been sorted I had explained the level of stress which had threatened to overwhelm me, I was so upset about disappointing him when something outside of my control had happened. His response had obviously struck a chord with me:

N, you have never let me down. You always try your hardest and do everything you can to achieve my expectations, you have never let me down or disappointed me.

This exchange surfaced in my mind as I spilled the bitter disappointment at Slave Lytton. And from this came the realisation that I had not let him down at all. had been ready. had done everything possible to make sure that could complete the marathon in the time frame he had set me. Yes, I was disappointed, and I would probably always feel like I could have done more, but… those where the last whispers of depression and I had to believe in myself.

So I started hunting for a replacement race.

A marathon that I would enjoy for my first time, and one that fit into my child free weekends. And one that would allow time for my knee to recover, but without being too far away for me to lose the momentum. Finding more races to keep me inspired in the meantime, I stumbled across a marathon. A new one. Fairly hilly, well located, beautiful views, and most importantly….lots of cake for finishers! The date was set for the beginning of May. I spent the next two months rebuilding my distance and regaining my confidence. It was during this time that I realised that sir had set me this task because he knew how much I wanted to achieve it, even though I didn’t quite believe that I would be able to do it. Even as I sit here typing that I can feel the tears pricking at my eyes. He knew he wouldn’t be here, but wanted me to grow without him, to finally learn to believe in myself unequivocally, in the same way that he always had.

What a gift to leave me with?

Roll on to the start of May. I don’t know how many of you have completed a marathon, I had no idea what I would actually feel like during the race or after the race, but the entire event just blew me away. I loved it, the whole damn thing! I can’t believe that I hadn’t believed in myself all along, that I hadn’t found the courage to train for and enter a marathon before then. There were a few moments when I stopped smiling, and they were in the third quarter (I’m told this is a normal time to find it hard) when I realised that I wouldn’t be able to tell sir that I had completed his task, and to thank him for believing in me. When I finally reached that finish line I jumped for joy. My amazing friend S-W-L had driven for hours to come and cheer me across the line. I jumped for joy, and couldn’t stop babbling about how proud of myself I am. The first time I have ever felt proud of myself without first having to have someone (including myself) convince me that I should be proud.

So that is my landmark moment, and the lesson that has translated from BDSM to everyday life to allow me to achieve.

But what is next? Do you think I am going to stop there?

Nah, I don’t think I could enjoy a life without challenging goals to achieve.

To paraphrase a very important man: Set a goal, plan, achieve, take stock and set a new goal. [Repeat]

Next stop is an ultra…. watch this space!

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Check out what else is happening over at Boobday.

#F4TFriday

 

Trust your landmark and run through the smoke was first published on A Leap of Faith.

It’s Elust 118

Elust 118

Elust 118 Header of My controlled ascent

Photo courtesy of My Controlled Ascent

Welcome to Elust 118

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #119? Start with the rules, come back June 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

I have daddy issues

Processing Emotions about Polyamory

Mirror Masturbation

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

V is for view

Not Alone

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Negotiating “NO”

 

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Tension

Erotic Non-Fiction

BDSM for Beginners
My first time being co-topped
The power of touch

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Hear My Confession
Avengers Assemble
#30DayOrgasmFun: Tapping Out

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

How I Started Moving Past Old Hurts
#AtoZChallenge -X is for XXX
Vanilla date #1: Incompatible-Awesome
Confessions of an unruly slave

Writing About Writing

Relying on Email More Than Social Media

Erotic Fiction

His turn in the shower
Sharp Beauty
Double Your Pleasure, Double Your Fun
Oxana, With Love
Sixty Nine Steps
Glorious garden fuck
Actually, that’s what the dog-whip is for

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Don’t ask us to watch you wank for free.

 

 

Elust

About 

The Editor-in-Chief of Elust and better known to the rest of the world as Mollyxxx

Caught in the lens

Woman in a vest top wearing a teal rope chest harness and black rope wraps around her thighs. Her long brown hair has fallen in front of her face as she concentrates on tying herself up. Fully relaxed her overweight belly rolls are quite pronounced as she is caught on camera.

Caught on camera, mid tie…

November 2017 saw me at the start of my weight loss. I had also just learnt about an app called whistlecam, recommended by my rope hero and friend to take difficult shots when I am otherwise occupied. Perfect!

Or not… What I hadn’t realised was that my text tone would set the shutter off at my least photogenic moment. I quickly averted my eyes, disgusted at my body and how I had let myself become. Focusing instead on the flying woman in the next (planned) photo.

Moving on to November 2018 I was reminded (by google photos) that I had this picture. It was a strong reminder of how much I had/have changed. Oddly, though I see the rolls what I notice more is my confident hands. I know what came next and I don’t know many people who can suspend themselves quickly, safely and securely.

18 months later the prompt for May’s Sinful Sunday is An Outtake Picture. I’m so proud to share this picture.

Rope doesn’t discriminate on size. Go and get yourself caught.

Sinful Sunday
Caught in the lens was first published on A Leap of Faith

 

V is for View

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Or perhaps I am clutching at straws to complete the A to Z blogging challenge. I have been wanting to share the story of my recent:

Fuck with a View

And with the passing of April comes the Kink of the week prompt Outdoor sex. Sometimes it pays to be behind with my blogging plans.

Regular readers of my blog will know that I love to be outside in nature, exposing myself in beautiful or quirky places, and occasionally masturbating in private-public spaces. What I have experienced very little of is outdoor sex with a lover, being fucked in my favourite setting. Not through want of trying, but through lack of willing partners. Until very recently my most memorable was the first time I met M. There had been a scattering of thrilling encounters over the years which take a bit more recall, I imagine that is mainly due to the relative privacy, or the location, but all this was about to change. I was about to up my game!

Dartmoor is my happy place.

If I share my Dartmoor time with you then it is fairly obvious (to me) that you are a little ray of sunshine in my world, one of the trusted few. So when I suggested that we head up there after lunch one sunny Saturday afternoon I was clearly relaxed and happy. I had known him for a number of months, discussing anything and everything that came to mind between us. The first time we met for coffee I felt a frission of electricity with him, but he was a man I met through running and had no idea he may be interested or even kinky. Frankly I had no idea if I would be interested really, such is my attention span when it comes to men. But my friendship with RunnerJ developed in a way neither of us were expecting…

That Saturday afternoon I ended up walking barefoot along the bank of the Dart, enjoying the soft, cool mud beneath my feet and fresh air in my lungs. We paddled, held hands, held each other and eventually he kissed me. Biting gently on my lower lip in the way he had done previously. Straining to reach up for more I groaned into his embrace as he held my hair, preventing our lips from meeting. I could see his blue eyes glinting in the sunshine, reflecting the river behind me, I could smell the damp, peaty earth and the fresh green spring growth, but I couldn’t return his kisses and the frustration grew. With each stretch up the pulling in my scalp sent delicious tendrils of pain snaking own my body, I whined with need and tried to surupticiously rub my crotch on his jeans. Desire had taken over and my hands dropped from his strong back to knead his ass while I attempted to gain friction for my clit. Though he manouvered his leg for me to rub myself on it was not quite what I wanted and my hands strayed to his belt, while he resumed the kissing. My mind had started to go somewhere else at this point, I couldn’t figure out the buckle and he had to stop kissing me to show me how to unleash him. A quick glance up and down the river showed we were alone, and I dropped to my knees to take a closer look. I don’t know that I’m a size queen, but I do prefer a generously proportioned cock, and I was not disappointed.

Trailing my tongue down his shaft  enjoyed his scent as his erection continued to swell.

I wasn’t entirely sure how I would manage to take it all given how out of practise I was, and especially seeing the two piercings. I’d never enjoyed a pierced cock before, and didn’t want to embarrass myself by getting anything stuck or doing it wrong! As is my way I took a deep breath, and got started. He seemed very pleased with my attempts, and though I know I will be able to do better with practise he mentioned that deep-throat was new for him. I was soon in my hazy space that I arrive at during cock worship; I would call it subspace, but power exchange hasn’t come up in our time together. He offered to take me home, and explore my body with toys, spend time on me in a way that he thought I deserved. My mouth said “No, my house is a mess, I won’t feel comfortable having you there” but my brain was silently screaming “Fuck me now, please just fuck me right here on the river bank”

Five, ten, twenty minutes passed, who knows? My mouth continued to explore and tease him.

I was pulled to my feet and kisses were traced over my lips which were covered in precum. His hand found its way into my hot dripping cunt, removing his hand and looking at the fluid drenched digits he pushed them into my mouth to clean before kissing me deeply.

“What do you want, N?”

Fuuuuccckkkkk….. How do I answer that? I’m great at communicating before and after, but once the wheels are in motion colours and safewords are the only way I am able to communicate my needs. Normally…. but we had spoken about anything and everything, and I trust him with so much that….

“I want you to fuck me. Right here. Right now. In the sunshine. I want you to cum deep inside me, and I want to walk back to the car as your spunk tries to soak my thighs.”

He stopped, put himself away and he looked around. I’ve gone too far I thought I’ve scared him, oh god. I wish I could just get back on my knees and… “Right, put your shoes on. We are going up there,” pointing at a tor, a short walk away. I’ve never put shoes on so quickly in all of my life. Soon, with wobbly legs I floated up to the rocks, guided by his strong hand. He reclined on the rock and I knelt between his feet in the dirt, with the view of a beautiful man and sparkling scenery behind him. Two of my happy places rolled into one wonderful afternoon treat. All too soon he was removing my mouth from his straining cock and standing up, he helped me to my feet and I pulled my jeans down just enough. The spring sunshine cooler now that we were out of the valley, but my hot wet pussy was burning for him. As I bent forward over the rock, exposing myself to him, he filled me. Gently at first, building the pace steadily until his thrusts became more urgent. I unravelled around him. Beyond aroused through the prolonged cock worship, and blissfully happy in my most special of places I came hard, vocalising my pleasure, as he flooded me.

Once we were both able to move we reorganised our clothes and we stood in the sunshine wrapped in each others arms.

The intensity of our triste threatened to overwhelm me, and as the fibre of his jumper tickled my nose I felt tears of contentment prickle behind my eyelids. We spent a little more time enjoying each others company: walking, having a hot drink at a local pub and then heading to our own homes, all the while our lusty juices trying to escape from between my voluptuous lips. Not long after I got home he messaged to make sure I was back safely, telling me he could smell us on his drive home. The perfect end to a lovely day.

And a fuck with a view, to beat all of the other fucks I’ve had this year!

OK, it was the only fuck I’ve had this year with someone who isn’t me, but I’m damn good at what I do!


#AtoZChallenge 2019 Tenth Anniversary badge

V is for View was first published on A Leap of Faith.

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