There is no greater obstacle than facing your own demons, but I like a challenge! I had attended Kink and Cake and decided the only course of action was to attend a local-ish club night- NMM. The fortnight between the two events were spent researching outfits and club rules. All of those little niggles that could well stand between me and my goal of getting to the event!
The day had arrived for me to conquer my fears.
I was prepared, physically and mentally. Work was done, the boys were with their dad and I was heading west for “The biggest & best Kink night in the South West !!” I was beyond nervous, but knew that if I didn’t keep pushing myself forward I would start to pull back into my shell again, like a Tortoise. I had no desire for that to happen. When I arrived in the town I ended up driving round in circles in the one way system. It took me three attempts to find the correct road and car park, but perhaps unsurprisingly I hadn’t noticed the club.
Fetching my rucksack from the back seat I noticed a familiar person. LTM, from kink ad cake, was walking out of the car park so I hurried to catch up. He walked me round to the event entrance that I had completely missed, introduced me to his friends in the queue. Waiting patiently I realised the man ahead of me was someone I’d been chatting to about rope, with the potential for him to tie me up. He was shy so I would have to ask, he’d told me. However, I was shy too!
As I moved toward the door the nerves and sick feelings gave way to calm resignation.
I had arrived, the queue behind me blocked any chance of escape and beyond the door lay a new world. As the door swung open I was greeted by three familiar smiling faces plus the venue owners. I was given a locker key and directions to the changing space but I couldn’t make my way through the crush of people so I stopped to chat with MT first. As he had been there early he had managed to hire a private room, and offered me to use it to change and store my bits. Accepting his offer I got changed in privacy and comfort, gathered my thoughts, took a deep breath. Then I stepped out to join the tour for newcomers to the venue.
There were four floors of kink to explore. Being a swingers club first and foremost there was a vast hot tub, sauna, steam room and showers; the social spaces were flanked by private rooms, and a dark dank dungeon space hid all the way downstairs with a larger play space at the top…
The large play space had a demonstration stage and a Fucking Machine.
MsD had told me she was taking it, and I would be welcome to try…if I wanted to. Less of a request, more of a cheeky challenge.
But would I?
What do you think? There were greater challenges for me by far that night. This would be a pleasant distraction… If I could just get myself up on the stage… By the time the demos had started the main space had filled up. One woman tried it briefly, then another for longer. I was watching the action from the side, wanting to go up but not wanting to… When the second lady climbed down from the stage I looked up and MsD was asking who was next. Catching her eye I was still humming and ahhing when she crooked her finger at me and smiled with eyes that said “You know you want to.” Fuelled by nothing more than Diet Coke my inhibitions melted away.
I wanted to do this, and I was damn sure that I would. So with an audience I stepped up onto the stage and stripped from the waist down, got into position and settled down for another completely new experience. I giggled an awful lot, and mostly rested my face in the cushion on the stage, but being watched over by so many people was quite a thrill. SL was stood by my side. He matched my giggles with respectful humour as his Mistress attempted to get his new friend to give in and climb off. I discovered new reserves of confidence on that mechanical thruster.
I didn’t orgasm on the machine but it did wet my appetite.
This wasn’t going to be the last time I used one. Though I had no idea when or where the next time would be. MT took me under his wing, introduced me to his group of friends. Later, while we all chattered away, he wondered if I would like him to cane my feet. He wanted to show his mistress what he could do. And he also wanted to make sure I had a good time.
Of course, I agreed! And he did a very good job caning my feet solo. He also used his tawse on my soles and on the palms of my hands, which felt delicious. Trautaruan and his CheekyC were also on hand to make my evening a great one. Her advice on foot protection when the heels had to come off (pop socks) and Trautaruan’s calming conversation helped prevent the overwhelm from crashing over me. That night some of my friendships within the community became established.
These gentle people made it easier to overcome an even greater obstacle.
The shyness which made my mouth dry up talking to strangers. The new friends who were making my night had been strangers just weeks before. I could do this! In life I had experienced bigger challenges and was starting to defeat them, how good would life become if I just kept pushing through?
As the night went on I chattered to so many new people, respectfully asking about things that were going on that I had never seen before, such as needle play. Seeing the variety of outfits and implements opened my eyes to so many more possibilities. Much of what I saw that night I had seen in porn. Some had been used on me in person, but to see all of these other people like me enjoying their kinks publicly was amazing.
And all of the beautifully different shapes and sizes of my fellow revellers triggered a change in me. I had learnt that Sir enjoyed my body. He had helped me be confident in my own skin, with him and myself. Now though I could see the wonderful diversity, not all the traditional beauties you would see on kink.com but so much more. Men, women and everyone in between. Outfits ranging from latex to lingerie to leather, all-black to brightly coloured.
There was space for everyone, and that included me. That’s a great thing to learn, even if I was a little late in that discovery. So I shall leave you with this quote as pause for thought:
“The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.”